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I did not cry those first months when the father has got to prison. It was possible to me not to cry during the holidays which were passing without it. I have sustained the first hearings about performance of conditions of the early parole, taken place through six months after refusal in its clearing, and I have endured following hearings a year later, and the following in one and a half year. Houses the life proceeded. Mum worked as the lawyer for Mauri Kravittsa, and then has arrived on the second job by the waitress, and later the fitness instructor in improving club which its girlfriend operated. After high school I have gone to Catholic high school Montini in the Pawnshop. Having entered this school, I have started to understand, how long the father was far from us and it has passed what most part of my youth. When I was at the first year, the father has again appeared before council about early parole, and to it have again refused. This time to take out it it has appeared for me more hard, than earlier. When I have heard news has left in the room and have burst out crying. Mum tried to calm me. Earlier she never saw, that I cried so strongly. But it was short, and anybody is more than it did not see. The father was in prison, and we did not know, its absence how much will last. During that moment I have decided that I will never not cry any more in the absence of my father. I should live the own way, as it was done by the father, and to be morally proof, to block this pain.
In the meantime I have realised: the best that I could make, is what was wanted from me by the father. I went to school every day, carried out requests of mum, played to a high school soccer team. Playing sports helped me to feel closer to the father though it was not a number. I never contacted drugs. I did not wish to afflict the parents and considered the use of drugs by weakness display. At school I consisted in the command of jockeys and participated in zone competitions by other kinds of sports. In this respect I was almost as my father. I was the sportsman and had friends in very different circles. In Montini I could communicate with children rich and middle class, and in area Sikero with bad reputation could be on friendly terms with the Italian children from poor quarters.
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